Over the weekend my dad, my niece and I went blackberry picking up in Mylor (Adelaide Hills). We had a fantastic day with a picnic, some exploring, lots of bramble-related injuries and a massive barrel chock full o' berries! This pic is from right at the end of the day, when we were at our most sticky and pink-stained. What a dreamy day... :) I made one hell of a blackberry jam when I got home - I'm such a nanna... It came up a treat, though, and people have been chogging it down all week (I'm looking at you, Chris and Meral!). See more photos here!

If you know me at all, you'll know I'm a huge history nerd. Every now and again I'll just chuck in some random posts about things that catch my eye...

I just watched a fantastic documentary about Australian swimmer, film star and women's fitness pioneer Annette Kellerman. She did a range of amazing things throughout her career (swam the Channel countless times, was considered the 'most perfect woman in the world', starred in early silent films) and shocked society by being the first woman to wear a skintight bathing suit. Cooooool.

Read about Annette Kellerman here!

So I've just arrived back from Melbourne, and it's been one hellava trip! Asian food, grown men doing the splits, sunburn, jelly wrestling, the US Consulate, human bowling... this trip had it all! Here's the day by day rundown on the insanity...

Thursday Jan 20 - It beginnnnnsssss....

5:45am - Awaken to the ear splitting sounds of the theme from The Godfather, cellphone-alarm style, and curse the day I decided a ten hour bus ride would be "fine". At this point I would sell my first born child for a private jet and a breakfast martini.

8:00am - Boarding the coach, the stench of urine from the bus toilet somewhat dampens my hopes for a pleasant jaunt on the high roads. Brochure images of smiling backpackers and friendly old folks dissolve into a scene from the seventh circle of Dante's Inferno. I guess it explains why every Greyhound bus has Abandon all hope, ye who enter here. in decal above the door...

7:15pm - Emerge from the bus depot on Franklin St., Melbourne, am swept up by my knight in shining armour (aka Steve) and whisked off for a quick restorative bevvy and some dumpling soup at Oong's in the city. Collecting Dave, we hit CBD at a run for some hot'n'heavy swing dance action.

12:00am - Cracker dances and general stupidity ensue (pix) - including Alex presenting me with a shotglass full of a disturbingly scent-less clear liquid - I steeled myself for a hit of 100%proof. Sadly, but to BL's great amusement, it was water, giving rise to the catchphrase "It's got no fragrance!!!!". Photo. Emerge from the sauna that is CBD and head off to finish the night with a little jazz and some nerdly MST3K. Geeks... pfft.

Friday Jan 21 - Davidette v. Goliath

11:00am - After a slow start and familiar last-minute nervous breakdown on my part, Alex, Steve and I find ourselves driving along St Kilda road (eventually in the right direction, no thanks to BL's superior navigating skillZ). Bolt out of the car, through the backstage-area-at-a-Kiss-concert-worthy security area and arrive panting and dishevelled at the American Consulate, only to be sent with extreme prejudice to the post office to fix an 'error' in my payment method. Bastard consuls. I personally think it was because I got busted rolling my eyes at the portait of George Dubbyah, but they'll tell you otherwise. Longstoryshort, emerge 2 hours later with promises of visa and riches unto half their kindom ringing in my ears. Well, the first bit, anyway.

1:00pm - Meet the boys around the corner, only to find them getting pissed at the Belgian Beer Cafe. Bloody typical!

4:00pm - Arrive a touch boozy and stuffed with Bridie O'Reilly's pub grub back at Steve's. Steel myself for a hard night of dancing at Funpit.

8:00pm - Awaken from lengthy afternoon nanna-nap to realise all desire to dance, or even leave my bed, has evaporated completely. Decide to pike out, and stay in watching Futurama with Laura. Sweet, sweet exhaustion...

Saturday Jan 22 - Steve's world, Steve's world, party time, excellent!! (Reoowwrrreoowwrrr!!)

12:00pm - Commence party preparation Phase One. 250 layered shots poured, slip-n-slide laid out, jelly wrestling tank in the opening stages of jellifying. Photo.

4:00pm - Party preparation Phase 2 - another nanna-nap for Kate. Woken to the sounds of insane swingdancers in crash helmets hurling themselves down the slip-n-slide. Initial tests show issues with the tentpegs holding it to the ground, giving rise to the name 'The Circumcisor'.

8:00pm - Guests begin to arrive. Exhibit A.

8:05pm - First tank of punch empty. Exhibit B.

10:30pm - Human bowling begins. Silly people with no consideration for themselves or others do silly things. Extremely amusing. See photos.

11:30pm - Jelly wrestling commences, with Dachelle and Gracie in bikinis going head to head. After the gentlemen onlookers regain control of their shorts, Alex and Laura get in on the tag-team action. All-in jelly melee ensues. See photos. Vague foggy memories of a "suck the chocolate off a crunchie bar" competition... The damning evidence! I manage to avoid being thrown into the jelly tank fully clothed. I am happy, so I have a celebratory drink. Or fifteen.

2:00am - ...blank...

Sunday Jan 23 - Oh the pain! The PAIN!

11:00am - Awaken feeling surprisingly chipper. Investigate outside and find several partygoers feeling decidedly less chipper. See photo. Blanks from the night before are filled in with the aid of digital cameras, anecdotal evidence, and Farmer's Union Iced Coffee. See photos.

1:00pm - A slap-up breakfast of bacon and eggs on the BBQ is served by the ubiquitous Steve to the seedy masses. Mmmmmmm. Grease. Mass exodus to the loungeroom, where ten dicey looking individuals recline in fetid splendour to watch Flying High, the ultimate hangover movie.

5:00pm - After tearful farewells to my friends, and my amazing and generous hosts Steve and Laura, I decamp to spend my last night with Dave, Brooke and Zoya at the Northcote house, my home away from home in Melbourne. Pix. Seediness hits with full force as we spend the night admiring Dave's sweet new bike, eating Thai food and watching 'Dodgeball'. What a way to go.

Monday Jan 24 - I love the smell of bus toilet in the morning

5:45am - Awaken to Godfather alarm. Wish fervently that my parents had had their respective tubes tied in 1975. Press the snooze button.

8:00am - After traumatic early morning tram-wrangling though the streets of Melbourne, finally find myself on a coach Adelaide-bound, albeit with a skull that feels like it's got Lleyton Hewitt living in it. Photos.

7:00pm - Stagger through my bedroom door to discover a self-addressed envelope on the bed containing my passport. The US consulate comes through with the goods!! Who would have thought a country ruled by a shaved monkey could have such efficient bureaucracy? I take back everything I said about the US Consulate and their respective mothers' sexual habits.

11:04pm - Release a contented sigh after a great weekend. Finish writing dull lengthy report noone will ever read. Remind self to get life. Go to bed. :D

So I have a grand total of three weeks until I leave for Canada. There's a crazy amount to do, but I'm bustin' my ass to get it done! I have my US visa interview in Melbourne on Friday morning - it's really important, but I have to admit it's a great excuse to get over to Melb and see the swing kids before I go... I'm hitting CBD for swing dancing on the Thursday night, there is Funpit (another swing thing) on the Friday, and then we have Steve and Laura's colossal housewarming shindig on Saturday. Honestly, if this thing turns out to be half as huge as it sounds, it might just be the party of the year (rumours of a 60ft slip-and-slide, 300 shots circulating hourly, and... wait for it... a jelly wrestling tank have been flying!). Methinks it shall be sweet... Anyhoo, I leave on the Monday morning, and after that I unofficially have 12 days until I leave (unofficially because i am at the mercy of the US consulate). The time is flying by, but taking an eternity, too - I'm having a really hard time being apart from Ian for these last few weeks... we've survived 6 months apart, but the next 21 days feel like forever. I just can't wait to see him, and get to Montreal. It still seems like a dream that I'm actually going back...

Well, it's Saturday night and I'm still in glowy mode after my faboo birthday party! After last minute insanity cleaning the house, having a nervous breakdown over the food (which in the end no one ate!), and still putting on makeup half an hour after it was supposed to start, it went off sweetly. After some stressing that my Miss Haversham nightmare might become a reality, people started flowing in - about 20 in all, which was perfect. It was so great to see friends I haven't seen in too long (like Michelle and Chuck, and Ruth) and all the usual suspects, too. The sweetest plum was my birthday cake (courtesy of Karene the domestic goddess), complete with daggy song and all! Eeeeeee! It was great to feel so loved and appreciated by my friends and fam (Ratty and Ben were there, and Pickas (with Steph) who may as well be family). I'm feeling the love, baby! Huge thanks to everyone who came. :)

THE BEST BITS - Cara paying out Chuck and meeting her match :D - Karene's panoramic camera nightmare - That awesome chocolate pavlova (thanks, Cat's mum!) - Getting given Canucks underpants (the Shub was stoked!) - Realising that paying out Mark about the 'girl's watch' is NEVER going to get old

Well, I just turned 29. Drag.

Ian just sent me this gorgeous photo his friend Ben took when they went to the Montreal casino last week. It's made me badly pine for ice and snow...

As for me, the rest of this warm day is going to be spent trying to clean up our hovel of a home in preparation for my short-notice birthday party tomorrow night. I ask you, why the hell do I do this to myself? I thought "Ooh, what a great idea - I'll have a birthday party and it'll be all about me! Me, I tells ya, MEEEE!!!". And it turns out it is about me - me cleaning and cooking like a slave and me feeling inordinately anxious that noone will turn up and I'll be sitting by myself like Miss Haversham in a party hat singing 'Happy Birthday to meee...' and eating a whole birthday cake, and... Actually, I think it'll be a nice night - one of those everyone-i-want-there-noone-that-i-don't kinda parties, albeit a small one. So I'm off to the shop to buy some ingredients for the finger food, just like a good grown-up should... yeah, who am I kidding?

In the interest of keeping in touch with my badly neglected family and friends during my travels, i thought it'd be a plan to start my own blog. Hey, I'm already 98% computer junkie - why not just make that final leap off the cliff of geekiness right into the ocean of having no life? :D If you choose to read on from here, you're a braver man than I (er... you know what I mean). I can't promise it will be full of excitement and tales of skullduggery on the high seas or anything, but it'll be my daily rollercoaster ride of good times, bad times and random weirdness. Please feel free to add your two cents at any time - I would always love to hear from you. Hold onto your hats, kids - this is going to be one spectacularly average adventure.